Unless you’re living in the darkest reaches that this planet has to offer in an environment similar to Gollum’s abode, well, you’ve probably heard the news that it’s one of the worst games to debut this year. Some are even calling it THE unequivocal worst product to come out of the industry this year. I’m sure that doesn’t count some of the horrendously shitty indie games on Steam, but I digress. Even fans of the series admitted this game to be a massive failure. From game breaking bugs, graphical glitches, performance issues, repetitive gameplay, and an unreasonable price tag, this game truly managed to fuck up just about every possible element of game design. So much so it makes hentai games look like gems.
Sex games have a stigma of being low budget and shitty, but I’ve seen a good bit of what the industry has to offer. A few years ago when we had more connections here at the site, I did hentai game reviews pretty regularly. Granted the vast majority of them were in the visual novel format which is a fairly easy style of game to code (speaking from experience), but still it’s amazing how much polish even the most basic visual novel had compared to this Gollum disaster. Hell, even games that dared to venture beyond the basic romantic visual novel still put it to shame. Subverse, while criticized for its early access model, manages to look way more appealing than the cave dweller simulator. Though I suppose since Gollum’s hair often turns to literal pixels that’s not much of an achievement. Point is, it’s amazing that a genre of games stifled by their fixation on sex still manages to put out a fair amount of games that are definitely more engaging than whatever the fuck is going on in this LOTR title. Huniepop’s puzzle gameplay can hold your attention longer than doing your goblin chores of pulling levers and gathering eggs.
What the fuck.
That’s enough negativity for one day, I think it’s time for me to start catching up with these June hentai releases. Gamers of the world, feel free to chime in. Do you play hentai games? Have you seen or heard about the hated release of Gollum? Would you rather play a hentai… you know what I don’t think I’ll bother asking. Hop in a cave, pull some levers, and find your precious in the comments below!
